WHAT WAS THE CRAZIEST DREAM JOB YOU'VE EVER WANTED?
To be a pirate...ON THE MOON! I would be called “Moon Pirate” and me and my band of merry people (no discrimination here…all are welcome!) would sail the Sea of Tranquility searching for adventure and moon booty (take that as you will). Also, they would be called “Moon Pirates” as well but with an “s” at the end so that they would not get confused for me when in moon ports. This is the basis of my new show, “Moon Pirates” premiering in 2020. Get your tickets now (so I can gauge how much interest there is in seeing it. If no one is coming, why waste my time writing it?!)
THE CHUPACABRA: FACT OR FICTION? DO YOU HAVE ANY EVIDENCE?
Fact. Do I have evidence? No. But that’s never stopped people before and it sure as hell won’t stop me now!
WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF THE ULTIMATE ADVENTURE?
Finding an unexplored land that holds hidden ruins, buried treasure, a deep, dark secret that mankind was not meant to know, chases, and just when it looks like all hope is lost, I dig down deep within myself and find the strength to save the day. So basically accounting.
HAS ANYONE EVER USED THE PHRASE "MUST BE REMOVED" WHEN REFERRING TO YOU? DID YOU SURVIVE? WHAT WAS YOUR REVENGE?
Absolutely! It was rather frightening, but the dentist got the wisdom teeth out no problem and I got ice cream afterwards, so all-in-all a win for me I think.
WHAT IS ONE TALENT OF YOURS YOU WISH YOU DIDN'T HAVE?
I can roll my stomach, much like a belly dancer. It’s not so much that I wish I didn’t have it, but it’s pretty useless to me. No one wants to see me do it, so unless I’m at home in front of a mirror killing time, I never do it.